Im taking my harness apart to clean up all the unnecessary wiring and preparing it for braided loom and rerouting. to do this right, you have to take all the connectors off to slide the braided loom on and be able to use heat shrink. So here is how to depin the big subharness connectors (the rest of the connectors with white locks on the inside are the same way)
On the inside of the connectors, there is a white cover. The goal is to remove the cover so you can get to the lever which releases the pin from its lock. So to do this, get a small flat head (or anything that will fit in the hole - i used a small precision flat head screw driver
Pop the white cover off like so
Now take your tiny precision screwdriver and put it into the female end of the pin. Lift up and push the pin out. You have to lift the pin out of the lock on the bottom.
congrats, you have depinned the connector. The male pin connectors are the exact same way except you have to use pliers to pull up the white lock.
I've got my harness laid out all nice now and its ready to be mocked up on the engine