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[Joseph Davis]

Well i probably should have mentioned that this is going down in a restraunt so they wont be coming back for a refund

If it's a chain/corporately owned restaurant you'll get caught pretty quick since there are accountants that sift the statistics pretty thoroughly.  Accountant = someone who can do simple math and balance a checkbook, and other middleschool level math.

If it's an independent affair, uhm, one in a hundred servers can balance their paperwork correctly at the end of a night, and the ones picked to be managers aren't picked for their math skillz.  Owner/operators are classically fools floating on parental or drug money, and even if they purchase a top of the line POS system that gives them all pertinent sales trends and statistics they are ultimately innumerate fools who don't know how to interpret numbers.

Owner: "Joseph, your weekly sales are 75% that of the other servers.  You need to work on that or we'll have to let you go."

Me: "I'm only scheduled three days per week and everyone else is scheduled five days.  That means I am here 60% as much as they are, so to net 75% of their sales means I am selling more per hour on the floor than they are.  Further, I've left early at least one night a week for the last couple months because everything's been slow, which means my per-hour sales are through the roof compared to anyone else on the floor."

Owner (huffy): "That's not how it works."

Me: "Then why does that report you're holding also show that I have the highest per head and per table sales of anyone on staff?  Look, down here it shows my per-hour sales and it's quite a bit higher than everyone else's."


The dildo would walk away mumbling to himself angrily, and then be back two weeks later with the exact same horseshit.  It's not that he personally wanted me gone - he had no problem firing anyone for petty reasons - he was honestly that stupid.

[PhilStubbs]

wow. thats incredibly stupid.


that statement applies to the post above mine and the original post.

[NaturalDecimal]

jd is a waitress


and i am a princess

[Joseph Davis]

jd is a waitress

It's been a couple years, but I'd do it 2-3 nights a week if I could.  Unrelenting geekery fucks my social skills.

[NaturalDecimal]

wine saleswoman, waitress, mother - you do it all! 

[Joseph Davis]

wine saleswoman, waitress, mother - you do it all! 

I'm also an expert at soldering two wires together, don't forget that.

[LS1pwNzJ00]

wine saleswoman, waitress, mother - you do it all! 

I'm also an expert at soldering two wires together, don't forget that.

And winnin ats dem rrgewmints witchur beeg werds

[El Beefo]

why is this stickied?.

[92CXyD]

why is this stickied?.

So the Authorities know who to question later. ;D

[NaturalDecimal]

thought provoking discussion req sticky

[HiProfile]

First check your company's SOP (standard op procedures) if they say not to do what you're doing. That way you can claim ignorance (sounds like you could use that regardless).

Next look into how they treat coupons. If you're not supposed to hand them out, you'll probably be fired w/o warnings.

Third look into how they handle tipping. Usually it goes into a jar and is split by some method at the end of the night.

Lastly, if all the above looks golden and someone gets pissy, you can get crafty. Just say each time you hand out a coupon to promote word-of-mouth promotion of the establishment. And each time they just happen to hand you a $10 tip.

jd is a waitress

It's been a couple years, but I'd do it 2-3 nights a week if I could.  Unrelenting geekery fucks my social skills.

Why would I not be surprised if your pink slip included "then Mr Davis overturned the table while shouting, HOWS THAT FOR FLUID MECHANICS?!"?

[Joseph Davis]

jd is a waitress

It's been a couple years, but I'd do it 2-3 nights a week if I could.  Unrelenting geekery fucks my social skills.

Why would I not be surprised if your pink slip included "then Mr Davis overturned the table while shouting, HOWS THAT FOR FLUID MECHANICS?!"?

Sir, such an exit line is the stuff of legends.

[TheMadScientist]

Why would I not be surprised if your pink slip included "then Mr Davis overturned the table while shouting, HOWS THAT FOR FLUID MECHANICS?!"?

That actually had me laughing for a good bit.

[forcdincivic]

yeah illegal, seen my buddy do this and get like 300$ from it. he had to reimburse shaws for it or he was going to jail.

[TheMadScientist]

yeah illegal, seen my buddy do this and get like 300$ from it. he had to reimburse shaws for it or he was going to jail.

You sir need to shut the hell up until you make a proper intro post.

[2slow]

Wheres the porn fag?

[forcdincivic]

Wheres the porn fag?

revisit my thread niglet.

[BoostedSchemes]

since its july is this still illegal or is it ok now and we can unsticky

[Hotrodlincoln]

since its july is this still illegal or is it ok now and we can unsticky

Its patriotic and we should celebrate it. Amurica! FUCK YEAH!!

[2slow]

I used 5 tonight

[LS1pwNzJ00]

sweet, how much extra did you make?

[2slow]

$50 i feel bad sometimes, but then again i only make $2.13/hr and i have to tip out alot of money to the hostess,buss boy, and bartender. On an average friday night my madatory tip out is $20-$30. Its based off my sales. Its 3.83% of my sales. Also im not allowed to add gratuity to large parties. So if i have a table of ten and their bill is $200 im tipping out $7 whether the table tips me or not. Its really gay. So sometimes the coupons are just an equalizer for the cocksuckers that dont tip

[Joseph Davis]

$50 i feel bad sometimes, but then again i only make $2.13/hr and i have to tip out alot of money to the hostess,buss boy, and bartender. On an average friday night my madatory tip out is $20-$30. Its based off my sales. Its 3.83% of my sales. Also im not allowed to add gratuity to large parties. So if i have a table of ten and their bill is $200 im tipping out $7 whether the table tips me or not. Its really gay. So sometimes the coupons are just an equalizer for the cocksuckers that dont tip

$25 at 3.83% equals $652 in sales.  I'd usually clear $110-130 after tip out on those sales.

If you get stiffed a lot, you either work at a redneck $10/plate dive where they come in to be waited on by semi-attractive trailersluts and are pissed off to see you, or you fucking suck and should either learn how to correctly drop a plate of food or get a different job. 

[92CXyD]

Sad I deliver for Domino's 2-3 dys/wk and make an avg. of $65/2hrs cash for tips.

I only have to report $2/dy plus what is added by the customer on the CC slip at the time of delivery.

It helps to drive a civic and get 35mpg+ in town w/ really low maintenance cost. :yes: ;D

What does suck is when you delivery a ton of pizzas to a church function and you get nothing for a tip.

[2slow]

I was saying i have to pay 3.83% of my sales. My average tip is 18%~25%,but 3.83% is what a i have to pay the hostess for sitting me. If i do 600 in sales id be pissed if i made anything under $120. I do get stiffed from time to time, because unfortunatly black people, teenagers, and whitetrash get hungry. 

[BoostedSchemes]

obama just signed a new bill into law making this legal so we can unsticky this thread. yeay, moving on...

[92CXyD]

2slow have you been busted yet?

just curious. ;D

[2slow]

Nope not yet. I doubt ill actually be caught though. This place is more ignorant to shit like this then one would think.

[CivicOCD]

the funny thing is, 4 other servers, the supervisors and HNIC probably doing it to and have posted the same question on another forum....

[Joseph Davis]

Stevemode unstickied this so it is now up to us to bump it daily so no one ever forgets.