Brief summary:
- Sleep 3-4 hours Friday
- Get up at 5AM and drive to NC
- Look at cool fucking projects and junk
- Have car tuned
- Emit noise from every possible source of squeaks/groans/knocks climbing Trailer Mountain
- Drink Vodka and Capri Sun
- lulz
- Travel to grocery store that appears to be a Messican establishment, but don't see any
- Go to friend's house in a very "dark" neighborhood
- Smoke
- Leave to go to party "in the forest somewhere"
- Hit surprise pothole
- Get stopped at checkpoint, evacuate smoke quickly
- Hear 4 times from the same person "yeah, I think I made a wrong turn"
- Traverse what seems like 2-3 miles of gravel 1-lane road in the woods
- Reach a shallow creek and frown realizing you must take your vehicle through it since you can't turn around
- Make it across and breathe a sigh of relief that your engine did not consume water and car didn't get stuck
- Reach a field full of high/drunk/tripping people, tents, campers, electronic music, and a couple fags "dancing" to it
- Get hassled for money to donate for the cost of the field, explain you will not be staying
- Leave, and have to cross the dangerous creek again
- Reach civilization, pull up directions to the next destination on the wonderful Android phone with Google Nav
- Miss turn and not be able to re-route due to being in the middle of nowhere without a signal
- Decide to stick with the current road (hwy 221) until it crosses a major interstate which will surely happen
- Realize after 45 minutes of driving 20-40mph through turn after turn in pitch black with no sign of life that there is no fucking major road intersecting
- Shit cinder blocks when commercial establishments are found and get the fuck off the highway
- Realize you are still lost at 3:30AM and take another highway (hwy 226) the opposite direction
- Realize it's 4:30AM, you still have no signal, and gas is running out with no gas station at night
- Find the Mountain Dew bottle to fill with anti-freeze in the event someone comes after you with a chainsaw
- Stop to piss multiple beers down a steep road and stand amazed at the river you created, trying to think of what to name it
- Eventually stumble upon another street, a large church parking lot, and a cellphone signal
- Tell yourself it's a sign you need Jesus
- Piss multiple beers on the church steps to display your disgust in god fucking with you all night while admiring the sunrise
- Leave towards your destination
- Lose signal and take a wrong turn, cannot divide by 0
- Wonder how the fuck you got to South Carolina
- Decide to visit your father for the holiday, and change destination to Georgia
- Test the efficacy of the noise-making strips on the side of the highway at 80mph as the lack of sleep begins to take a toll
- Shit pants when you repeatedly wake up in another lane, or on the shoulder, or quickly approaching another vehicle full of people with shit-filled pants
- Slam on the brakes when you wake up and realize you're about to drive into a tractor, bicyclist, wall, boulder, etc
- Realize they were really just inanimate objects on the side of the road that for some reason appeared as something else
- Finally make it to Columbus, GA at 10am and send texts to father and all friends in the area
- Stop at Auto Zone to top up the oil while you wait for replies and argue with teenage ricer that LS-VTECs are not unreliable and that a t3/t04e .60 can actually spool before 6000rpm
- Perform burnout in said parking lot to show superiority over their pieces of stock rice shit
- Visit the one friend that responds while waiting for father respond to his son that could have died in the mountains from anti-freeze consumption
- Hear back from father hours later that he's 1.5 hours away with a slut
- Realize the tank of gas and hours of driving to GA was a waste of time and head home
- Fall asleep at 80mph, wake up, shit bricks, get back into lane, repeat
- Wake up heading straight for the rear of a cop car parked on the side of the road, hit the brakes, maneuver around it, and decide to solve the nodding problem
- Amass a variety of energy drinks and pills
- Finally get home at 6pm and notice the curbed rim and missing chunk of sidewall due to pothole
- Get messages from everyone in Georgia with invitations to hang out
- Post on RHMT
12:48AM Monday and no sleep since 5AM Saturday.
How was your weekend?