So I pulled the advance auto distributor off the car. Upon removing the cap a screw dropped right out onto the ground. The screw was one of 3 holding the base plate into the distributor housing. The other two screws were loose as well, and the plate could easily be wobbled by hand. What a piece of SHIT.
The ignitor checked out (some nameless unit, no company wanted to take credit for), 2 k ohms between tach signal and switched gnd, but maybe that screw bouncing around inside was fucking with the other sensors. I'm going to put the old hitachi unit in and see if that helps.
The thing that sucks is, I can't really just return it and get my money back. My old distributor was filled with cracked wires, rusted screws and bad connections. So I need the new assembly, but I know all the rest of the sensors/parts in it are shit!
I am tempted to just suck it up and buy the new distributor from Honda, 400 some $. If anyone else is going through this that might be your best bet.