so, i was bored, and starting digging...
pico de gallo is a salsa...
4 cloves of garlic
1/2 an onion
4 tomatoes
1 bunch of cilantro
4 limes
3 serrano chilis (or whatever peppers you damn want)
kosher salt
black pepper
laid out on newspaper for easy clean up
slice the onion in half, the slice along the root part like this:
...then against ur last cut to cut them into small to medium dice:
then throw that shit in a bowl
...dice up the tomatoes to the same size and throw that shit in the bowl too:
dice up the red hot chilli peppers to about and drop that shit in the bowl:
tear the bottoms stems off the cilantro with your hands:
and chop through them ONCE to make them look like this:
then throw that shit in the bowl
mince (chop to finest) the garlic [nice shot of the DTM knife]:
slice the limes in halves and squeeze into the mixture:
season with KOSHER SALT (iodized salt tastes like fuckin chemicals)....
hint: add enough so that the flavors get sharper, but not too much so that
you taste salt. for this recipe, i use about 1/4-1/3 cup of kosher jew salt.
fresh ground pepper ALWAYS!!!! same rule applies as the salt
mix that shit with whatever you gots:
cover with plastic and store for the next day's comsumption
(so the flavors have time to get aquainted and get sexy and all that shit)
the following day:
break out a bag of ur favorite tortilla chips, liquid gold (green bottle for me)
and some and ur copastetic!
mangos, pepinos, red onions, avocado and other shit can be thrown in if you want.
use this recipe as a base.
Your basic chicken fah-jeye-tuh [Peter Griffin] recipe:
3 large chicken titties, breasts
1 red bell pepper
1 green bell pepper
1 orange bell pepper
1 yellow bell pepper
10 flour tortillas
s&p (kosher n fresh cracked)
4 oz. Chivas Regal Whiskey (substitute JD, Hennessey or whatever the fuck you want)
12 oz. Heineken green bottle
I. Lay out your boobs and drizzle olive oil on one side. then hit it with some kosher
salt and fresh cracked pepper (breezie cracked the pepper for me). do the same for the other side as well.
II. Preset your oven to 300. wrap your tortillas in a double layer of foil and throw em in the fuckin hot box.
III. Get ur veggies out and pick the garlic as the first vicim.
smash the cloves with the flat end of ur knife and peel the skins off.
mince the garlic up. larger chunks = lesser garlic flavor
smaller chunks = greater garlic flavor. get it?
take the onion and bisect it down the middle of the root, and peel the outer layer of skin off.
Then, cut the root ends off.
two onion halves and my left foot.
FUCK FUCK FUCK!! during this whole shit, the vegetable slicing tuturiol pix got deleted!
FUCK!....fuck. ZC pretty much, i cut along the ''grain'' of the onion at an angle to make cresent
like slices. think of like, wedges of an orange. that's what you wanna acheive. as far as the bell peppers go,
try your damn best to cut them into strips. then, throw all that shit in a bowl!!
damn i was pissed. so i poured two shots of whiskey (and green bottle chaser) for me and the downest person at 11
5 in the a.m. In this case it was my 94 yr old g-ma. g-ma's gangsta...she dont need a chaser.
''TO FINISHING THIS FUCKING RECIPE WRITE UP/LUNCH!!!
BOTTOMS UP!
continuing on....
IV. Heat up a pan with like 3 tablespoons of oil in it at a really high heat
(for really thick chicken titties). I heat up my pan really hot cuz it's aluminum (less residual heat),
but if you have a steel pan or griddle, keep the heat mild and steady. once the pan is smokin hot,
place the boobs neatly in the pan.
check the first breast you put down, and if it's golden brown...flip it over.
do the rest of em once the time is due
V. Once both sides are golden brown, put the tits on a sheet pan. or if the pan you cooked em in is oven safe,
just keep them in the pan. either way, just put the mutha fuckas in the 300 degree oven to cook the insides of
the boobs.
while you're cooking the chicken to an internal boob temp of 138 degrees you're gonna cook the veggies.
VI. If you used a sheet pan or something, use the same pan from the chicken to cook ur veggies. if not,
just throw the garlic in a pan with some oil.
then before the garlic starts to brown, throw in the rest of the veggies.
Season the veggies with fresh cracked pepper and kosher salt
while you're cooking this vegetable mix, bite 1 of each of the different kinds and stop cooking them once they
get to a consistency that YOU feel is good to eat in ur fajita. you can cook it a lil so that you have really
crunchy-crisp veggies, or cook it too all hell full boost so that you end up with limp veggies.
VII. Once the tata's are cooked on the inside or it's juices run clear or the insides aren't raw or they've
reached the internal boob temp of 138 degrees. what the fuck ever. let them rest for like 2 min so the juices
inside can settle down. then, slice them like so.
VII. Put the cooked veggies to one side of a large platter and the sliced chicken on the other side. like so.
VIII. Pull your tortillas out. Serve with your favorite hot sauce (for this, Tapatio tire hat) and liquid gold
(again, green bottle).
You can damn well use flank/skirt steak if you want. i think it's better when you use flank steak. but all i
had was chicken, sucky for me. just cook the steak the same way, but instead of putting it in an oven, put the
steaks inside a double layer of foil to keep em hot.
Stay tuned for the next installment of How to... fried ice cream
u prolly read the topic of subject and said ''WTF well, here it is....
you'll need:
Ice cream (whatever flavor or type)
bread crumbs or crumbled corn flakes
ice cream scoop
frozen sheet tray or dinner plate or 'whatever the fuck you have'
plastic wrap
vegetable oil
pot for cooking
you can use any ice cream you want. my favorite type of ice cream is Gelato (italian ice cream).
i used the green tea flavor i picked up from Trader Joes.
you'll need an ice cream scoop and a sheet pan or plate or piece of slate...pretty much whatever the fuck
you have. and with 'whatever the fuck you have' make sure it's cold from being in the freezer.
Scoop out ur cream and shape them into balls, or cubes...whatever the fuck you want
scoop out how many you're gonna use and place it on that cold shit of 'whatever the fuck you have.'
i made mine into the shape of balls. cover them and put them back in the freezer for a minimum of 5 hours.
next, crack an egg or two, mix it up and put it in a bowl. at the same time, put bread crumbs or broken up
corn flakes in a bowl as well. these will be used for batter.
once your ice cream (shaped) has been in the freezer for at least 5 hrs., dip them in the 'egg wash' then
the bread crumbs/corn flakes and put them back on the sheet pan/'whatever the fuck you have' and cover it
with plastic wrap. then put it back in the freezer for at least another 5 hours.
repeat the dipping/batter step so that you coat the ice cream 3 times!!
then, fill a pot (lol, i said POT) with enough vegetable oil to cover you're ice cream thinggy.
and get something to hold ur ice cream thinggy with...here, i used a potato masher.
you can use a strainer or whatever the fuck you want.
this is what the fried ice cream ball looked like immediately before i dropped it in the frying oil.
before you fry this mutha...keep in mind that you wanna make sure you're oil is hella hot (about 350-375 degrees).
..and you drop it in the fryer immediately after you get it out of the freezer.
fry the ball/square or whatever shape you made it into for 10 seconds or till it looks golden brown like this:
dab the ball with a paper towel to rid of the oiliness.
eat that shit and enjoy deep fried frozen goodness!!!!
***if you wanna get creative with it, you can season the dry batter (bread crumbs or corn flakes) with cinnamon,
nutmeg sugar or whatever floats ur boat. i demonstrated a plain batter.
*******stay tuned for the next recipe installment: basic chicken fajitas.
and btw, here's a pic of my new HKS intercooler in pieces (need to weld the end tanks). yeah it's kinda dinky
i know, but for 150 bucks brand new...size didnt matter. anyone wanna buy a used starion intercooler
Here's the 5 min. recipe you voltures have been asking for....
you need:
-half a banana
-2 tablespoons of brown sugar
-2 tablespoons of butter
-2 tablespoons of your choice of liqour (i used Grand Marnier [french orange cognac] you can use banana
liquor most common is rum. make sure it's 35% alcohol or more.
I. Slice the half of the banana in half lengthwise and have all ur ingredients ready on a plate
II. Melt the butter with the sugar in a saute pan and mix
III. Put the bananas in the sauce
IV. take the pan away from the flame and add ur liquor
V. Put the pan back on the flame and tilt the pan towards the flame to ignite the fumes, watch ur hair.
VI. Plate that shit in a ceramic or heat resistant bowl.
VII. Add a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top
thass it!
Panty drop time: 5 min cooking time, 5 min eating time, 4 seconds panty drop time= 10 min
4 seconds to punana!
This is good when you have like 1 slice of left over pizza and you wanna stretch it out the next morning.
you need this stuff, 3:1 compression ratio of eggs to pizza slice, garlic, onion (yes you can leave it out u puss)
, kosher salt, fresh ground black pepper, oil
cut the crust off and cut the slice into strips, then uniform cubes
chop the onion and smash the garlic with your hand knife, whatever, just getrdone
Cook the onion till brown (or 'carmelized') then add the garlic, hint: while the onion is browning whip
the eggs in a bowl and try to use a non stick pan!
cook the garlic for a couple of min but dont brown, then add the pizza and season with a pinch of salt
and a pinch of fresh ground pepper
cook the pizza until the cheese starts to get stringy and gooey
then add the eggs
take the eggs out when cooked through, serve with your favorite hot sauce or ranch... and.... ZAGAZOW!!
pizza eggs mah ninja!