Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[arsenio]

I haven't seen or spoken to my dad in about seven or eight years. It turns out he is in town from San Diego and wants to meet up. Him and my step mother have been blowing my phone up, but I just ignore it.

Am I a bad son?

[turbob16hatch]

What? No back story makes this thread useless. Just admit he touched you down there and your not ready for round 2.

[Joseph Davis]

Do you really care y/n?

Now insert that answer into: Will you go see him y/n?

[92CXyD]

Dude, I have not talked to my Dad, Grandparents (Dad's side), and the rest of my dad's side of the family (except a couple of my cousins) for over 20 years.

Things happen either face it or say fuck it.

[arsenio]

  Back story: I don't have a vagina, so I am not emotional. I really only care about myself for the most part.
 He never called me all this time, so I never called either.

"do you really care?" no

"will you go see him?" no

[Joseph Davis]

So, are you not answering the phone because you are a pussy, or because you really have nothing to say and they won't understand how their emotional blackmail has zero effect on you?

BTW, who gave them your phone number?

[SloS13]

Things happen either face it or say fuck it.

You forgot the third option: "face-fuck it"

[arsenio]

I belive my mother gave them my number.

I don't think that I am a pussy in this situation. I just never really cared about much of anything my whole life. I don't feel bad that I don't want to see him. I was just curious if I should feel bad.

[turbob16hatch]

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

[arsenio]

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

Me.

[Joseph Davis]

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

Me.

Me also.

[Adam Hopkins]

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

Me.

It dosent sound to me like you have a "I dont care attitude", Sounds to me like your being selfish. Unless your dad has touched you in a how to catch a predator way then go see him.

[arsenio]

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

Just reread this. I'm not asking if I should go see him. I'm not going to. I was wondering if that makes me a piece of shit for not wanting to see him.

Well i think you needing to make a thread asking if you should see your dad, says something. who doesn't at least go to lunch when a parent comes into town after that long. 

Me.

It dosent sound to me like you have a "I dont care attitude", Sounds to me like your being selfish. Unless your dad has touched you in a how to catch a predator way then go see him.

Could be. And no, he never touced my wienis.

[DRQPQUT]

2 each his own.....no your not a bad son, if your dad gave 2 shits about you he would have been in your life instead he made a new life with his new wife!!! he made it perfectly clear what he wanted...

[Joseph Davis]

Sounds to me like your being selfish.

Being selfish is disowning your son for a piece of USDA grade C middle aged strange pussy.

I know you have a loving, caring father which is why you've taken the stance you do.  In your word father = family = loyalty = love, even if the road through your childhood was a little rocky.  I hate to have to break it to you but to a lot of us father = absent = piece of shit, and therefore your $0.02 doesn't mean anything.  Don't take that a bad way, just be glad you have a father worth spending time with because it sounds like you were lucky.

[Ghetto_D]

He's dying and needs either a kidney, piece of liver, partial lung, or the lower half of your large intestine, why else would he call you after all these years, other than for parts. That whole hes in san diego thing is too convenient, he probably has an apointment at the hospital for the transplant and is good to go.

or maybe he just wants to say hi.

[Adam Hopkins]

Sounds to me like your being selfish.

Being selfish is disowning your son for a piece of USDA grade C middle aged strange pussy.

I know you have a loving, caring father which is why you've taken the stance you do.  In your word father = family = loyalty = love, even if the road through your childhood was a little rocky.  I hate to have to break it to you but to a lot of us father = absent = piece of shit, and therefore your $0.02 doesn't mean anything.  Don't take that a bad way, just be glad you have a father worth spending time with because it sounds like you were lucky.

There is no doubt the dad was selfish if he did that, and it would hard for anyone to forgive someone for doing that.

It all depends on what perspective you want to look at it from. IMO life is not just about what you accomplish or the amount of shit you have cluttering about your house, the car you drive, or the middle aged grade c squish mitten you pound on. It is also about the people you interact with, the relationships you have with them, and the impact you left on those peoples life. Maybe the dad is just now realizing that. It would be more important to me to give the guy another chance than to make him feel like shit by not answering his calls. Or I would at least have the decency to answer the phone and tell the guy why your not going to meet with him. But thats because I confront problems and dont just try to ignore them.

It sounds to me like the father might be trying to start a line of communication, and see if he can change the impact that he has left on his son.

I can understand being bitter and angry about things people did in the past, especially abandonment from a father figure, but what the fuck is one afternoon or some lunch. It might change your perspective on him, or his on you.

Like I said before, If he has not touched your little man pride, beat your mother, raped your sister...etc, you could at least meet with him to see if you could milk a free meal out of him and maybe reopen a relationship with your sperm donor.

Then again according to yoseph, I was raised by the Brady Bunch so my opinion does not matter.

[buk9tp]

Correct. Your opinion does not matter.


You're asking someone who, as a child, was forced to live without any kind of reinforcement whatsoever, probably encountered shitbag after shitbag of old dudes mom brought around  because she has a kid and is off the market for decent guys, has developed an emotional system for coping with all of these elements, which is probably centered around a lot of distrust, and generally has had to deal with a fuck load of shit that kids with two parrents never even consider to drop gaurd and give some shitbag who wasn't man enough to acknolwedge his kid with decent intentions.

I'm all for giving people second chances, but this is one of those situations where you get to play the game back and you go for blood 

[potatodude]

I haven't seen or spoken to my dad in about seven or eight years. It turns out he is in town from San Diego and wants to meet up. Him and my step mother have been blowing my phone up, but I just ignore it.

Am I a bad son?

Why wont you answer my calls? I just want to visit.

[j.h.christ]

[Joseph Davis]

It all depends on what perspective you want to look at it from. IMO life is not just about what you accomplish or the amount of shit you have cluttering about your house, the car you drive, or the middle aged grade c squish mitten you pound on. It is also about the people you interact with, the relationships you have with them, and the impact you left on those peoples life.

No, it's definitely about the cars.

Then again according to yoseph, I was raised by the Brady Bunch so my opinion does not matter.

Correct.  However, there is one thing I'm not fully clear on... are you Marcia, Jan, or Cindy Brady?

[Adam Hopkins]

1. No, it's definitely about the cars
2. Correct.  However, there is one thing I'm not fully clear on... are you Marcia, Jan, or Cindy Brady?

1.And what are you driving now?   
2.ZING, I have nothing for that. +1 internet

[Joseph Davis]

1. Procharged 1994 3.4 liter V6 Camaro

[highroller54]

1. Procharged 1994 3.4 liter V6 Camaro

when did you start hanging out with porknpolish 

[Doug]

Sounds like you're a pussy. If you aren't emotional or didn't care you would just answer your phone and say you don't want to meet him.

[BoostedSchemes]

I have not spoken to Mrs. Joseph Davis senior in almost 22 years but if she called me, you best believe we'd go for brunch.

[Stealthmode]

  I have a "dad" that ran out when I was 4, because it was convenient. When I was 15 we met again and it was gonna be this "great father-son relationship", but the reality was he was just some old guy who I knew gave two fucks about me, and I was just some shithead kid he was trying to use to void his guilt. Shortly there after, we parted ways for good.

  In his mind, he's just talking about meeting up, but he really wants to do this same thing. The problem is that even if he's a super great old guy who had fucked priorities with his kids, you'll always resent him for what he did. End result means don't meet with him, but tell him (by answering the phone) that you aren't able to let strangers mingle in and out of your life as "family".

  Once you have sons (as I do, and you may- IDK), you realize just what kind of coward would have no relationship with his sons, and come up with some petty excuse like money, etc..

  As for my dad, he can live and die with his faults, and so will I. Running out on my sons won't be one of them.

[arsenio]

Sounds like you're a pussy. If you aren't emotional or didn't care you would just answer your phone and say you don't want to meet him.

It guess it could be possible that I am a pussy in denial. But I would hope not.



I think what made me have no real feelings for him was that he pretty much fucked up my childhood. I'm sure he didn't want me around, but constantly fought my mom for custody so he didn't have to pay child support. With him being in the Navy, and having to move back and forth between the two, it was a shitty life.

[colt45]

try to have some foresight... your old man might not be around forever.

don't live in the moment, like a crazy pregnant woman, and try to think how you might feel when he passes on.  no second chances after that shit. 

i know you say you don't care, and you that maybe true.  i just think you shouldn't deny yourself an opportunity to be cared for, or apologized to, or ass kissed. 

maybe your dad feels like a dick for not being around, or maybe he's calling you because his booty stash is making him.  i suggest you find out first hand.  you might come away from the evening feeling justified in not caring, or the opposite.  the worst thing you can do, IMHO, is to wonder "what if?"

[Corey]

maybe he won the lottery and wants to give you a bunch of money but only if he can get you to agree to meet with him.