Topic: how NOT to raise your infant (Read 3901 times)

marcj · « **on:** June 03, 2009, 11:54:38 AM »

Okay, so Monday morning I missed my chemistry exam, didn't quite make it in time and the doors were closed. I come back home, walk in to my house and see the battery powered swing up on the coffee table fall off (dont ask me WHY it was on the coffee table). So I yell "calvin wasn't in that, was he?".. his mom runs out of the kitchen yelling "OMG".. I say " YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT?" I hear him crying.. I start yelling, telling her how retarded she is, etc.

we take him to the ER and they run CT scan. they find he has a tiny hemorrage of the frontal left portion of his brain, in the sub arachnoid space of the cranium. we spend two days in the hospital with him on vitals being observed.

He's fine and needed no furthur treatment, but I had to explain to my wife that back and forth rocking motion has the tendency to MOVE things regardless of the situation, it will have energy to move. she justifies it many ways.

A funny part of all this is when the neuro surgeon comes in asking me what happened.. I explained it by adding "She's retarded and didn't consider it walking itself off the coffee table".. he lets me finish and replies "so, his mother is retarded?" in a serious tone.. I lol'd and said "metaphorically speaking. "

I will upload day 2 pics.. it was too serious to get day 1 pics. I was stressing hardcore

Kenny Rogers · « **Reply #1 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:09:59 PM »

Man, that sucks. Granted it was pretty dumb to put him on the table, I bet she feels really shitty about what happened.

No worries, I fell on my head a handful of times as a kid... I turned out alright :yes:

highroller54 · « **Reply #2 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:16:14 PM »

Wow

97Econobox · « **Reply #3 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:17:59 PM »

So shes justifies it as in she doesnt understand how her stupidity played a role in your childs life threating injury?

?

Damn son. I hope everything is well with your son and hope he has a speedy recovery.

ratcityrex · « **Reply #4 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:20:42 PM »

Hope hes ok. Bet of luck man. On a side note, I went down 13 concrete stairs in a walker when I was 8 months old. Good things kids are pretty durable

Ghetto_D · « **Reply #5 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:20:55 PM »

man i would have killed her, No matter how much women fuck up they always try to come up with an excuse or a reason. Heaven forbid you drop your baby because she would probably divorce your ass. Glad to see Child Protective Services didnt pay you guys a visit

highroller54 · « **Reply #6 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:38:27 PM »

Quote from: Ghetto_D on June 03, 2009, 12:20:55 PM

Glad to see Child Protective Services didnt pay you guys a visit

I bet they will.

Joseph Davis · « **Reply #7 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:56:52 PM »

I called them, they said Friday is a good day.

ApexSilver06MR · « **Reply #8 on:** June 03, 2009, 12:59:20 PM »

all that matters is that the baby is okay.

Quote from: highroller54 on June 03, 2009, 12:38:27 PM

Quote from: Ghetto_D on June 03, 2009, 12:20:55 PM
Glad to see Child Protective Services didnt pay you guys a visit

I bet they will.

they visited someone i knew.

their 2 kids were super skinny and cps didnt think they were getting fed right.. lol

Tim · « **Reply #9 on:** June 03, 2009, 01:26:18 PM »

Damn, how old it the little guy?

My son rolled off the couch right in front of me and landed on his head. I had him lying against me and he just spun and rolled off faster than I could blink. It scared the shit out of both of us (him literally) but he was perfectly fine actually slid most of the way before falling. But he's already a bruiser at 6 months.

AWDstylez · « **Reply #10 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:08:51 PM »

So forget about justifying it for just a second... what was the point of putting it up there in the first place?

Sinister · « **Reply #11 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:10:28 PM »

^ Exactly my question, why was it not on the floor in the first place? Putting it on the endtable is just double stupid though. And yeah with the retarded part I know not to use that term because working in the medical field everyone takes it literally haha. Hope your kids okay though and... to be honest I don't know what to say about the wife, since that is extremely common sense right there

92CXyD · « **Reply #12 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:28:47 PM »

she was not vacumning was she? ;D

marcj · « **Reply #13 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:29:16 PM »

I agree with you guys completely.. we've already discussed the visit from children safety, which is totally reasonable. her excuse for having him on the coffee table was that she wanted him higher to watch the kids shows, but doesn't remember WHY she turned the swing on in the first place.. fucking women never learn common sense because they are pampered by parents and then boyfriends their whole life!!

anyway, he's doing fine.. the bruises are almost gone. his eye is stilla little puffy

here's my little squirt day 2 of the accident

marcj · « **Reply #14 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:36:33 PM »

He was watching Barney

He's only 1 month past his due date. he is literally 3 months though because he was about 7 weeks premature.

jeffsciv23 · « **Reply #15 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:36:58 PM »

glad to hear hes doign okay.
sorry to hear the wife is retarded, i had one of those before

highroller54 · « **Reply #16 on:** June 03, 2009, 02:54:18 PM »

holy fuck I asumed you at least had him for a little while before you broke him $:-\$

shadow · « **Reply #17 on:** June 03, 2009, 03:02:17 PM »

Quote from: highroller54 on June 03, 2009, 02:54:18 PM

holy fuck I asumed you at least had him for a little while before you broke him $:-\$

lmfao. glad to hear your kid is fine.

AbaZ · « **Reply #18 on:** June 03, 2009, 03:23:57 PM »

Definatly a story you will never forget, and probably laugh about later on for years. Glad hes ok though.

DmC · « **Reply #19 on:** June 03, 2009, 03:28:16 PM »

Womens stupidity just drives you crazy sometimes. I can fully understand how your feeling as my girlfriend is a special case all her own. Glad to hear he's ok. Man watching barney really come on at 3mo's a babys awareness is like this ...Am I comfortable? am I fed? Check, do not trigger crying sequence.

Tim · « **Reply #20 on:** June 03, 2009, 03:32:03 PM »

Quote from: DmC on June 03, 2009, 03:28:16 PM

at 3mo's a babys awareness is like this ...Am I comfortable? am I fed? Check, do not trigger crying sequence.

that made me lol

papercuts · « **Reply #21 on:** June 03, 2009, 07:33:06 PM »

wow insane shit there for sure. so she was in another room when u walked in the door and saw him backflip off the table? i would be so pissed if my wife did that shit when Kaleb was younger.

on a side note i was a chruches chiken one day when this black family walked in 3 adults and 2 kids. the one kid was prolly 9 months maybe a year. well the dad went to change arms holding hte baby and completly missed it somehow. caught the baby by the ankle just in time to slap the babys head into the brick tile floor. wat do they do. finnish ordering their food and take the baby outside and wait. i shoulda called the cops.

salesmonkey · « **Reply #22 on:** June 03, 2009, 11:09:59 PM »

my moms a pretty bright lady but when i was a kid she left me on top of her car and forgot i was on top because her brother was over visiting. they went about a mile before a mail man saw my baby carrier on top of the car and chased my mom down honking. i could imagine how my mom would of felt after seeing me barrel roll off the car.

onlyflash944 · « **Reply #23 on:** June 04, 2009, 12:25:49 AM »

Quote from: AbaZ on June 03, 2009, 03:23:57 PM

Definatly a story you will never forget, and probably laugh about later on for years. Glad hes ok though.

just don't let any of his friends know about it when he grows up, because if you do, they will be playing the 'that's because he was dropped on his head as a baby' card every time he does something remotely dumb

baby einstein FTW

shadow · « **Reply #24 on:** June 04, 2009, 04:18:44 AM »

Quote from: salesmonkey on June 03, 2009, 11:09:59 PM

my moms a pretty bright lady but when i was a kid she left me on top of her car and forgot i was on top because her brother was over visiting. they went about a mile before a mail man saw my baby carrier on top of the car and chased my mom down honking. i could imagine how my mom would of felt after seeing me barrel roll off the car.

wtf.

marcj · « **Reply #25 on:** June 04, 2009, 09:05:08 AM »

Quote from: salesmonkey on June 03, 2009, 11:09:59 PM

my moms a pretty bright lady but when i was a kid she left me on top of her car and forgot i was on top because her brother was over visiting. they went about a mile before a mail man saw my baby carrier on top of the car and chased my mom down honking. i could imagine how my mom would of felt after seeing me barrel roll off the car.

that's a classic story..

johntsi · « **Reply #26 on:** June 04, 2009, 10:26:00 AM »

Quote from: marcj on June 04, 2009, 09:05:08 AM

Quote from: salesmonkey on June 03, 2009, 11:09:59 PM
my moms a pretty bright lady but when i was a kid she left me on top of her car and forgot i was on top because her brother was over visiting. they went about a mile before a mail man saw my baby carrier on top of the car and chased my mom down honking. i could imagine how my mom would of felt after seeing me barrel roll off the car.

that's a classic story..

sounds like raisin arizona to me

effingturbo · « **Reply #27 on:** June 04, 2009, 11:06:25 AM »

Jackass - Daddy and Baby

Tim · « **Reply #28 on:** June 04, 2009, 11:07:57 AM »

maybe your woman was eating your drugs and that's why she was retarded?

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Author Topic: how NOT to raise your infant (Read 3901 times)